Finally, after all, the twists, turns, ups, downs and the occasional cartwheels you and your Japanese girlfriend’s relationship has been through, you have reached the point of no return. You have finally realized that life will no longer be complete without her by your side, and you want to cement the relationship with tying the knot. Proposing to a western girl can prove challenging already, what more when proposing to the girl of your dreams who just happens to be a pearl of the orient? Here is a simple guide for you to plan out the grand overture that is your wedding proposal to the Japanese girl you want to spend forever with.
Parental Consent
No matter if your Japanese girl is 21 or 30, it is mandatory to seek parental consent first before the actual proposal. Well okay, it might not be mandatory, but if you want to get on the good side of your future in-laws, (and to avoid having your wedding called off mid planning), it is best to seek blessing/permission from her parents. Not only will your Japanese girl respect and love you for it, but her parents will also see that you are a deserving man to give their daughter over to. Although it will be best to propose to your girl first, so she can arrange for you meeting her parents.
Stay in Japan or Bring her Home
In line with the first item on the list, you better be prepared with the question of where you and your future wife will be living. That should be something that you and your girlfriend have discussed even to you planning to propose to her. That is because Japanese grandparents are very, VERY, fond of their grandchildren and if it happens to be that your future wife is an only child, then, be prepared for some serious bargaining on where you and your future family will be living.
Ring or No Ring
To a man who has been born and raised in a western culture (US/Europe), then proposing marriage to a woman will mean a ring with a sparkly gem on it. But what of the Orient cultures? Rejoice! For it has been long ingrained in the history and culture of Japan that rings be exchanged upon engagement. Also, modern Japan is slowly adapting to westernization thus more and more Japanese women are expecting the diamond engagement ring when the guy proposes. But, don’t be too upset if she doesn’t wear the ring all the time. It is still quite normal for engaged/married women not to wear rings.
The Engagement Party
Better known as the Engagement ceremony. In Japan, you are not officially engaged until the engagement ceremony is done. Not like in the west that the moment the girl says yes, then you are officially engaged. A traditional Japanese engagement ceremony can be very expensive and is only usually practiced now by the affluent families. But for the average folks like the most of us, a fancy dinner arranged for both families (if you can get your family to fly into Japan for this special event) to talk about the upcoming nuptials. But if you would like to impress and if you are willing to shell out upwards of 10,000 USD, then a lot of resources are available online regarding this.