You’re right when you say that dating is a whole lot different in China compared to what you’re used to in your own country. China is a country with years of preserved tradition and culture so it basically follows that there are certain ways in dating that the Chinese do differently. To give you an idea of what this is like, here are 5 differences in the dating scene that you will experience when dating in China:
1. School First before Dating.
As you may well know, education is highly valued in Asia and China is of no exception. Most students burn the midnight oil for academic excellence and for the Chinese college entrance exams so there’s really not enough time to “date”. High school students resort to distant admiration and secret puppy-love relationships but, ultimately, serious dating happens when a student finishes his or her studies.
2. Parents and their Role.
While most Western parents don’t really meddle in their child’s romantic involvements, Chinese parents are the opposite. They are more involved than you think. If a parent or even a grandparent disapproves of their child or grandchild’s potential mate, continuing the relationship will be like walking up a steep hill – it’s going to require a lot of effort and patience.
3. Sometimes More Practical.
In Western culture, people grew up with the notion of how a boy and a girl falls in love and how they end up together. Butterflies in the stomach are involved, the world stopping, the heart stopping and whatnot stopping is also said to happen. Let’s not forget the fireworks felt during the first kiss.
It’s different in China because, sometimes, people go into relationships for more practical reasons. Sometimes a Chinese couple will marry for stability – the man has a house and has a good job while the woman runs her own business. It’s not always about love but there are instances where two people marry because of it. Majority, however, lean more towards practical reasons.
4. Intimacy Before Marriage.
The Chinese culture is very conservative and so it its society. Generally, the couple should take part in their first intimate act during their wedding night. When a couple practices intimacy before marriage, when known, it will have serious consequences with both families so couples choose to keep it a secret.
For Chinese women, they view intimacy as a sign that the relationship is headed towards marriage but Chinese men, on the other hand, prefer to marry a woman who’s a virgin.
5. The Pressure is On.
Aside from the pressure that most people experience during their school days, another kind of pressure is felt post-academically and that it the pressure to find a good wife or a good husband. This kind of pressure if felt from Chinese families who desire the best for their family member. The pressure is felt even more by Chinese women and men who pass the age of 27-30 without tying the knot.
So what do you think about how the Chinese date? It’s very different than the Western dating scene isn’t it? This is why there are Chinese ladies who resort to online dating or moving to another part of the world to find a foreign husband – they can escape the pressures from their culture and they can have the freedom to marry for love rather than for practicality.