Table manners differ from country to country. There is also a big difference between what is considered rude in the East and the West. And in Japan, a nation with a rich history and culture all its own, have their own set of dining etiquette. And in Japanese dating, especially in fine dining establishments, these code of manners will be expected of you. Be ready by keeping in mind these few for Japanese fine dining.

Chopsticks

Despite lacking the wide range of varying spoons and forks all arranged neatly on the table, there are quite a bit of rules regarding chopsticks use. Basically, a big chunk of Japanese dining etiquette revolves around chopstick use. To make things simple, the main rule is never to point chopsticks at anything, don’t stick or stab them in food and limit their use to picking food up and placing them in your mouth. Though, just for reference, here’s the specific list:

• Never point chopsticks at anyone.
• Do not use it to point to food either.
• Do not wave them over food.
• Do not rub them together, nor play with them.
• Do not suck on them. Even if the sauce is so damn delicious.
• Don’t use them like forks and stab your food with them.
• Do not stick them up in rice like incense.
• And if you wish to pass food, do so by placing the morsel on a plate and pass the plate. Never from chopstick to chopstick.

Wet towels

In most Japanese eating establishments, you will be provided with either a hot or cold wet towel upon being seated. These towels are used to “wash” your hands so limit their use to cleaning your hands. Do not use on your face, or neck, or wherever else. Just clean your hands, fold them neatly, then set aside. Your server will collect them prior to the first course being served.

Dipping sauces and condiments

When you engage in the Japanese dating scene, a bit of culture research is in order. This should teach you that the Japanese are people who frown upon excess and dislike wasting resources. The same can be applied when eating out. Soy sauce can be found in almost every dining table in Japan. But avoid the urge to slosh it directly on your plate or rice. Instead, place a small amount in a dipping bowl and dip your food, once (double dipping is a no-no). If you use it up, you can always refill.

With wasabi, this should be used in only small amounts. When eating sushi, the dish itself already has wasabi in it and putting lots of wasabi in your soy sauce might offend the chef. As for sashimi, use sparingly as it might overpower the flavors.

Itadakimasu and Gochisosama

Itadakimasu is the western counterpart of saying grace. It roughly translates to “I gratefully receive.” It is customary for you to say this phrase prior to eating. And once you are done with your meal, gochisosama is the phrase to say  translating to “thank you for the meal”.

In Japanese dating, despite the fact you are from the west and from an entirely different culture, this will show your respect for her culture and your willingness to learn and be part of it. To make sure you say it correctly, you can actually ask her politely to show you how it is said. This should score you good points and should give her a nice impression of you as a person.